Is unconditional love a myth?

It’s amazing how fast I can get used to doing nothing. I thought that not having to work would make time move more slowly this week, but it actually hasn’t been too bad. Perhaps I really did need to take the time off, because I haven’t been bored. Having nothing to do has felt OK….

Distracting myself in the therapy break

Well the therapy break is almost over and I have only a few more days to get through. It’s never as horrendous as I anticipate, but it is always hard to manage without seeing J. I know I will survive it each time, but surviving is a pretty low benchmark for daily life isn’t it?…

Art became rage

I got home from work at lunchtime in a shitty mood. I knew I had an empty afternoon ahead and I was fantasising about the destructive ways I could fill it. I sat for an hour or so thinking about the options and formulating dangerous plans. After a while sitting with the exhilerating thought of…

The vast unsaid

A restless being dark and powerful she is the culmination of voiceless years The vast unsaid in every feather forged from silence swallowed and quiet, rumbling rage She swirls and swoops with momentum building anticipating the opportunity to prey on me once more Embodying all that I loathe, I hate her but I am her…

First painting of 2017

In the past few weeks I finally found some motivation to start painting something again. I was happy to get it finished this afternoon. Here are a few progress shots and the final thing.

Impending family visit. Help.

My week is panning out to be full on and I’m not coping well with that idea. A few days ago I wrote about needing to fill time in order to avoid sinking into dark and destructive thoughts. The problem is, I’m running out of energy and now I am faced with a load of…