A lifetime of shame

I want the picture back
the way it was before
I landed where I’m stuck
here on the floor

World spinning
mind swimming

I might be face down
but I won’t stay down
and let the loneliness drown
me in melancholy
There’s nothing funny here
nothing good about this fear
all consuming
there’s just no room in here

So I keep breaking
they’re all forsaking
what I’m left with
and in my fractured heart I know
I’ve been robbed
of all the joy in my soul
what makes me whole

I’m in pieces
a nightmare that never ceases
just release me, please
and set me free
let me smile
let me out to swim peacefully
in a place
where no one wants anything from me

Because they’re vampires
draining all the hope from my veins
asking their questions
then telling me that I’m insane
when I don’t want this

Don’t want this history
don’t want to spend a second more
just being me
My life exploded
my confidence eroded
no faith,
no hope
for something more

A lifetime of shame
slammed closed that door.

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