Why I hate World Mental Health day

This week, we were treated to ‘World Mental Health day’. Aren’t we lucky? Isn’t it nice that we were given an allocated day to feel special and important? Sorry to start off so sarcastic, but the whole thing p*sses me off. It’s a hollow, pointless lot of noise that ultimately will make very little practical…

A few days in the North

The weekend away was a mixed bag. I struggled being away from my home comforts, my usual safe place and my routine. I cried in public quite a bit. But despite all that it was good to be somewhere new and get out in the fresh air. We managed some wet and windy walks and…

Finding some small comforts

I posted yesterday about this huge sadness and pain I’ve been experiencing this week. It was really lovely to have so many suggestions from you guys when I asked for advice on how to manage it. The fact that people took the time to write their thoughts for me has helped in itself. Reading through…

Please tell me how to get through this

This is a plea for advice. The reasons why are a lot to go into, and I haven’t got the energy for explaining right now. But the short story is I’ve suddenly found myself smack in the middle of intense emotional pain. It feels like huge, heavy, overwhelming grief. It is completely unbearable. I keep…

Distracting myself in the therapy break

Well the therapy break is almost over and I have only a few more days to get through. It’s never as horrendous as I anticipate, but it is always hard to manage without seeing J. I know I will survive it each time, but surviving is a pretty low benchmark for daily life isn’t it?…

Another painful birthday

How is it that a date can trigger so much distress? It’s just a day, like any other in the year. But today is a day that brings to mind so many things I would rather forget. I struggle to refer to my brother’s child as my nephew, just as I struggle to refer to…